Daniel’s Journal #51 – Here I Sit…

No, I’m not broken hearted. Just disappointed.

There’s more to life than meets the eye, but more is less. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, but its only skin-deep. Third example not found, error #102.

We all entered this world pre-programmed. Did someone say you can do anything if you put your mind to it? You believed them? OK. Then shoot electricity out of your eyes. I’ll wait.

The world is changing, always changing. By “changing”, I mean “dying”. Can it heal itself? Sure. It’ll start as soon as humanity goes extinct.

So here I sit, doing nothing, worried about my online presence, the reach of my next book, and all the people who see me as an insect that grew too-large wings overnight and lorded over them in the morning sun.

I do think about those people from the start of all of this. I keep most of them in my mind with a fondness of who we all used to be. We represented something that can never be repeated. Some relationships are volatile, and some people outside want to see how quickly they can take that volatility and cause a chemical reaction. For this group of friends, it worked.

And that’s how it goes. People change. They move on from what they once were. We all do. The version one represents in your mind’s eye changes too. Sometimes it’s for the better, and sometimes it’s not. But why does the betterment of one mean the worsening of another? It doesn’t. So why does that fondness of which I spoke earlier sometimes taste bitter when I think of it?

Social Media gives us the ability be someone else. Don’t like who you are? Here’s a digital mask. Now you can treat people like you believe you’ve been treated through the magic of anonymity. It’s OK. They probably won’t figure out it’s you. Drag them back to the level they tried to escape, the one where you believed they left you.

And to be clear, I’ve been in both of these places.

Here I go, changing again. I can feel it. What kind of person will I be next? Who will I be? What will I be?

I can be whoever and whatever I want. Better watch out for my electro-vision powers!

That’s my manic mindset. Take it or leave it. Just don’t regret your decision.

-Daniel Aegan
8/12/19

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Because I’m still a self-promoting asshole, click this book link of mine:

Blood Drive by Daniel Aegan

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